Febuary 1, 2010

Was January as rough a month for you as it was for me?

I tell you what I think January is definatly the month where all the old things from the past year, the things you want dead, are in ICU and they just slip away. January is the month of change and fight and letting go and moving on.

And I think that is pretty brilliant.

So Febuary I am devoting to the new beginings that I want to come out of this life that I have. My work schedule has changed on its own to work in my favor so tommorrow I have to get up and make preperations for school. Switch back to the diploma program so I can be done and go to Peidmont and look at applying to start Summer or Fall finances willing. Is it weird that when I wrote that, I began to smile? I think this is a sign that I am doing the right thing. I know I am. I have to be.

I have some ideas in my head about future projects. Things that will do good works. Things that I hope can happen, even at just the grassroots level. I pray everyday for God to show me the way, then I start thinking and these ideas start coming.

Also I am thinking I may start running. I need to find some way to get out some more of this built up frustration that I have. Its pretty intense to be me sometimes and I need to figure out ways of getting it out. I think running/biking will be my ways of doing this so we shall see how it all works out.

I just pray that there are windows opening for me and I can get my old highschool councelors voice out of my head saying no one will accept me. It has taken me quite a long time to finally figure out what I want to do in this life but I am there and I feel like I am walking to happiness. I am at its front door

I just need support, prayers, the occational kick in the behind (if need be).

I keep sending out the love so if you find some, pick it up...its yours.